A Rare Look Inside Kaia Gerber and Austin Butler's Private Romance

Kaia Gerber and Austin Butler aren't into drama.

Unless, that is, they're headed for the the red carpet, where they're batting a thousand when it comes to OMG style moments.

And in a nod to real old-school Hollywood glamour, the super-private pair have remained tight-lipped about their relationship since indicating they were in one back in January 2022, a month after an early-morning yoga class sighting sounded the new-couple-alert alarm.

"You have to silence the outside world," Gerber, 21, told playwright Jeremy O. Harris for i-D in 2020. "The only people who know anything about anything are the people in the relationship. The public is very loud, so you have to make your own feelings even louder."

So, she and Butler let the way they look at each other do the talking. And the fact that they keep showing up for each other speaks volumes.

While they made their red carpet debut at the 2022 Met Gala, and then Gerber came close to stealing the show in a slinky red Celine halter dress when Elvis premiered at Cannes, it's always the quieter moments that signal a partner's support.

That summer, only Gerber's arms were visible—and identifiable thanks to the "I know" tattoo on her left outer wrist—as she wrapped them around Butler for his V Man photo shoot.

She was by Butler's side when he attended the Jan. 22 memorial service for Lisa Marie Presley at Graceland, the sudden death of Elvis Presley's only child coming days after Butler won the Golden Globe for best actor in a motion picture drama for his mesmerizing turn as the late rock 'n' roll legend.

Though Gerber skipped all the ceremonies so that Butler's performance—and not her fashion choices and their general togetherness—would be the focus as he soaked up Elvis accolades, the model met up with him after the Globes and was his date to the Vanity Fair Oscar party, the A-list blowout that signals the real end of award season. And after that brand of March madness was over, they opted to unwind in Cabo San Lucas, hunkering down at a private resort.

The couple then traded in sequins and satin (and sandals and sunglasses) for T-shirts and jeans to hang out with some of the young patients at L.A. Children's Hospital, painting, playing games and autographing a guitar for the playroom.

Then it was back to what they consider to be normal life, mixing events such as the TIME 100 Gala, where Butler was honored as one of the year's most influential people, and a July 4 trip to Paris with coffee runs, dog walks and casual date nights. And sometimes they make it a foursome, joining Gerber's parents, Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber, for pizza in May and hitting Nobu Malibu for dinner with Karlie Kloss and her husband Joshua Kushner on Aug. 13.

"I think that she kind of sees how my husband and I have dealt with it throughout the years," Crawford, who's been married to Kaia's dad for 25 years, told People about her daughter's approach to living and loving in the public eye. "Which is not like, we don't ever try to, 'Oh, we can't go there because we might get photographed.'"

In fact, the Meaningful Beauty founder added, when it comes to social media and what one does or does not share, "I'm learning along with her about that stuff, but I feel like she seems like she has a very good head on her shoulders and is figuring out how she wants to create that private work-public balance."

Gerber's Instagram is an immaculately curated ode to fashion, her career, family, books, travel—basically everything the Bottoms actress loves except her boyfriend. And of course that's also by design.

Butler, who's celebrating his 32nd birthday Aug. 17, politely told GQ for a May 2022 story that he wouldn't be talking about his then-newish relationship with Gerber. 

"I don't think there's anything I want to share about that," he said, "but thank you for providing the space." (And that was the reigning gracious kiss-off until Gwyneth Paltrow's "I wish you well" came along this past March.)

Only as he was awash in award nominations did Butler share a nugget from his last relationship, several years after it ended and with his ex engaged to someone else. And even then, he mainly was giving credit where it was due, confirming that his former girlfriend of nine years, Vanessa Hudgens played a key supporting role in his life-altering decision to take on the role of Elvis. (And even then, he didn't name names, though everybody knew who his "partner at the time" was.)

Having been half of such a high-profile twosome before, Butler wasn't surprised by the attention paid to his new relationship, but having his picture taken every time he runs an errand admittedly isn't his favorite part of being an actor. 

"I go, 'If I don't see the picture, then it doesn't really exist to me,'" he told GQ. "I don't want to be really negative, but there's hardly any job I despise more than paparazzi."

He currently has two posts on his Instagram: The trailer for Dune: Part Two (which is due out Nov. 3 but reportedly might be delayed if SAG-AFTRA remains on strike) and another expressing thanks for being named a global ambassador for YSL Beauty's men's fragrance MYSLF.

But again, it's not as if Butler and Gerber are in hiding or trying to keep their couple status a secret. They do go out and enjoy themselves, and you can scroll on to see their romance in photos:

The 2022 Met Gala on May 2, 2022, was their highest-profile date yet. Gerber donned Alexander McQueen for the occasion while Butler's threads were by Prada.

Gerber and Butler only had eyes for each other at the May 25, 2022, premiere of Elvis at the Cannes Film Festival.

They make for a striking pair at W Magazine's Annual Best Performances Party on Feb. 24, 2023

Butler didn't get the Oscar in 2023 but he got the girl at the Vanity Fair afterparty.

The couple visited with the young patients at Children's Hospital Los Angeles in April 2023.

The cool kids take their time making an entrance at the TIME100 Gala on April 26, 2023, in New York.

Butler made TIME's list of the 100 most influential people of 2023.